Coping with Crohn's Disease

Crohn's disease comes with a lot of life altering challenges. To start with, Crohn's is incurable. There are a lot of unknowns when it comes to Crohn’s and a lot of unknown variables. No patient is the same when it comes to severity, symptoms, and flare ups so every time a patient walks in the door at a GI doctor, it is like a brand new finding each time. A Crohn’s patient can go into remission, a point at which there are little to no flare ups and where it is essentially a calming period. Just like we can go into remission, we can also “relapse” if you want to call it. With Crohn’s, there can be numerous amounts of times where we are perfectly fine and then 5 minutes later we can be on the floor in excruciating pain. It is then where we feel that we have no control over our body and our only option is to wait it out.

Not only does our life consist of pain physically but pain mentally. The feeling that there is no way out of this is appalling and makes us feel helpless. We didn’t chose to have this so we always ask ourselves, “Why me?” The journey that went along with my diagnosis changed me for the better, but what can I do now? Throughout my life, I will be challenged by this disease because it doesn’t end. I will constantly be challenged and tested to see if I can handle the pain that comes with this. The scar that I see on my stomach goes both ways for me as to feelings towards it. The positive feeling is that I remember the strength I gained from this experience and I metaphorically compare my scar to me bouncing back and healing. I was literally torn apart and overtime I bounced back and healed, just like my scar. The negative feeling I get towards my scar is that when I look at that scar, it reminds me that it could happen all out of the blue again just like it had before.

Crohn’s disease not only creates physical and mental pain but also financial pain and worry. Due to the fact that this disease is incurable, I will need to be on medication for the rest of my life. I am blessed to still be a minor and covered under my parents healthcare insurance, but once I turn 26 I am on my own and that throws a lot of pressure on me. My medication costs about $4,000 per pen and I have to take 2 pens a month. You do the math and think about a 26 year old trying to pay off their student loans, get a job, rent or buy a home or apartment on top of coming with that guaranteed payment of $8,000 a month. It’s already a worry to find a stable paying job with benefits these days and now the pressure is raised to an extreme level. Many of you may be saying, “Oh but you have so much time so why do you worry?” I am a proactive person rather than a reactive person and especially when it comes to money I will stick to that method. Medications aren’t the only thing I would have to take on as an adult. With Crohn’s comes doctors who specialize in Crohn’s, their appointments every 3 months, and multiple procedures annually. Having Crohn’s makes people grow up fast.

While all of this is overwhelming, one way that I find ways to stop this thinking is by meditating. I sometimes just need a moment or few to think and stop my mind from thinking these crazy thoughts. I use the headspace app or sometimes I just go to YouTube. At first, I thought mediation was dumb and that it was a waste of my time, but over time it started to work for me. Like everything in life with patience comes a reward so try it out!